Michelangelo – It is important to point out that “Overrated” does not necessarily mean bad. In fact, I like Michelangelo. He’s my second favorite Ninja Turtle. I’m pretty sure there is a consensus on Raphael being the worst. I mean, how can anyone like a constant buzzkill like Raph? I wanted to like him, with red being my favorite color, but that idiot knows nothing about being a ninja. Would a real ninja expose himself in New York City just to see a movie? What an unnecessary risk that was! To top that off, you might think he would realize that a human sized turtle might stick out in a crowd. But I digress…..
Back to Michelangelo. On the surface, he seems like such a fun guy. The so called “party dude” of the bunch. He likes to dance, joke around, skateboard, and eat some pizza. What’s not to like? Well, to me Mike always seemed like the frat boy of the bunch. If there was a Ninja Turtle who was going to tell you how much he drank the last night, it would be Michelangelo. Like the frat guy, he may be fun to hang out with at times, but when you need him the most, he’s too busy doing other activities like tanning or raping. How can we count on Mike, when we know he may be too busy skateboarding when you’re being attacked by the Foot? Not to mention, his weapon always seemed like the weakest of the four. So, many may be quick to proclaim Michelangelo as their favorite, but I say: Overrated!
Bro, I had like twelve slices of pizza last night!
I DON’T CARE!!
Donatello: I know what you’re thinking. “Donatello, THAT NERD?” I think the main reason Donatello gets slept on is because he has a feminine color. In fact, when I see the color purple, I also associate it with evil things like Baltimore Ravens fans and Barney the Dinosaur. Unlike the attention seeking Michelangelo and drama queen Raphael, he speaks softly. Plus he carries a big stick. Teddy Roosevelt would’ve been a big fan. And did I mention that he is the brains behind the operation? A true ninja can keep a low profile and maintain his composure at all times. As a wise ninja once said, “fighting always last answer to problem.” Not that Donatello can’t fight either. When it comes to crushing the skulls and metatarsals of the Foot, Leonardo and Donatello are your turtles. So, you can have your loud goofy pizza eating turtle any day of the week, I’ll take Donatello.